the week did get better

It was a grim start to the week.

Thursday afternoon I realised how much work I had managed to do and how clear my head had been that day.

I wish everyday my mind was devoid of fog, like it was on Thursday.

It was a good day!  I need more of these days please!

I managed to do two Xtend Barre classes.

There was a mild blonde moment for the class I was supposed to do on Friday night.

In the morning I went to the PTSD programme, which is really not too much fun, having to relive the robberies.

Afterwards, I had booked myself in for a facial and neck and shoulder massage.

It was wonderful, a nice treat.

I chilled at home for a couple of hours and then went for a nap, with the class at 7.30pm set in my mind.

I woke up and there was a reminder on my phone that the class was at 6.15pm. 😦

It was about 6.30pm, so it had already started.

I now will need to do four classes next week.  😐

It is going to be a busy week.

Monday night – Placebo

Tuesday night – Xtend Barre

Wednesday night – Xtend Barre

Friday night & Saturday morning – Xtend Barre.

Tonight, we might go to a local restaurant for dinner, so we can relax over a couple of wines.

Tomorrow (Sunday), I am working, so home to catch up on some of those things on my long list of things to do!

I have randomly had some dark thoughts cross my mind this week, even after my good day on Thursday.

When “normal” people go through bad times, do they think to themselves by default, “I wish I was dead, then the pain would go away”?

I hope you all had some good times in the week. We all need a bit of relief from the madness sometimes.

60 day challenge – week one

Well week one is done.

I did the three classes, which is what is required for the Core level that I am doing.

Im so glad I did it.  I am finally doing some exercise other than with the couch.

On the couch, off the couch, on the couch etc. etc.

My muscles all over have been quite sore at times.  Some muscles in places I cant remember ever hurting before.

Ive been surprisingly good with the clean eating as well.

I was a bit naughty last night at my friends birthday dinner at a local pub that has nice food.

I had a steak, which is OK.

But I had my usual hot chippies with pepper sauce as well.  I didnt eat all the pepper sauce, it was to dip the chips in.

Hot chippies are my weakness.

It must be the English blood in me.  I looooove hot chippies and even better is a hot chip butty! Mmmmmmm mmmmm.

There are three levels for this challenge.

Core is the one Im doing.

It requires three classes a week.

I can have two coffees or tea a day and two alcoholic drinks a week.

No food with preservatives, no dairy or gluten.

This I can manage.

But I could not resist the chippies!

I also had a mini donut, which is what they brought for my friends birthday cake.

It was only a teeny one, but naughty all the same.

I will try harder next week.

There are no birthdays, so hopefully I will be safe!

The other levels of the challenge are harder (obviously).

The next level is four classes a week, one coffee or tea a day and one alcoholic drink per week.

The crazy level is five classes a week, no coffee! or tea! and no alcohol.  Crazy!

I think only one person is doing the crazy level from the Xtend Barre studio I go to.

so much to do

Everything is going way to fast.

I dont know where all my time goes.

Other than work, dinner, shower & bed, I dont know where it goes.

I will be doing three Xtend Barre classes a week, but I still want to read a book a week, like I was doing for the last three months of last year.

I havent done much blogging or  reading this week.  I want to read more of your blogs.

I like to read other people’s blogs, too see what everyone else is up to and to see how you are coping and how you cope.

I want to study this year, but my brain is still to foggy for that.

Monday night is recovery night after the first day of work of the week.

Tuesday will be Xtend Barre at 6.15pm and then go home, shower, eat and probably go to bed early.  bf will be at fencing.

Wednesday, bf goes to trivia with the boys.  I used to go, but a couple of them ogle at women like theyve never seen legs or skin before.  Theyre married and they make it seem like theyre in prison.  I think they should think what it would be like married to them!  Theyre nice guys, but really…

Wednesday will be Xtend Barre at 7.30pm.

Hopefully the PTSD programme will help with this.  I think tomorrow is week 3 of 10.

They use cognitive thinking methods, to help train the thought process to go through a more positive process.

Last night I did the 7.30pm class because we were meeting a lady that might clean our apartment, as we dont have a lot of spare time and I dont want to do all the cleaning.

I managed to sneak in a 45 minutes – 1 hour power nap before the class.  Im sure I could use that hour better with blogging or reading.

Thursday would be a good night for studying or blogging.  Blogging only at this point, until the fog subsides.  Some Thursdays I will meet up with some of the girls that dont go to fencing much either anymore and have some bouts of fencing.  Maybe every second Thursday, depending on who is available.

Friday is both of our nights off anything, so we will chill or go out to dinner.  Last week we went to a new Japanese place.  It was good, but did not beat our favourite.

Saturday is my sleep in morning until 11am and then off to a Barre Camp class for 1 hour and 15 minutes.  After that if the weather is good I will do some washing and hang it out and tidy up a bit.  During the week we tend to not put everything away, bf is the  bigger offender of this.

I sit in the backyard and get some sun if the weather is good.  I could then blog or read or if I could ever study again, study.

Saturday night is either chill or go to dinner if we didnt on Friday.

On Sunday I have been making the effort to get us up early and we go to feed the ducks at the Park and have an egg & bacon roll and a coffee or go to a cafe for brekky.

Then for the rest of the day, bf might do some washing and I will do whatever.  I dont know where Sunday goes.

And then we do it all over again…

60 day challenge

I started a 60 Day challenge on Monday.

It is with the Xtend Barre studio not too far from home.

xbarre xbarre2 xtend-barre-1I have to do 3 classes a week.

I did a class on Saturday with all the other people doing the challenge.

My poor buttocks, thighs, calves, waist, just about everywhere was sore.  So Im guessing my body is in shock as the only exercise it has done in the last 12 months is getting on and off the couch.

It started on Monday 10th February.

I have done one class this week.  One tomorrow night (instead of today, I didnt make it to work today) and one on Saturday.

It’s paid for ahead, so that one more incentive to do it.

Xtend Barre is a mixture of ballet barre work, pilates, yoga and aerobics.  It definitely targets all areas of the body, because some parts of body that have never felt from exercise before, I can definitely feel now.

It also includes clean eating.  😦

I have been good so far this week.  Ive only had one afternoon at work, when I was feeling pressured by my workload that I really REALLY felt like eating chocolate.

BUT I didnt.  Yey for me!  It was not easy.

Im into Day 4 and doing OK.  Not craving chocolate.

Weirdly, I am craving sultanas and I have run out.  I should get some with our Aussie Farmers Direct delivery tomorrow.

A little box of those is really what I crave.  Weird.

Wish me luck!

more crying

I am still a bit teary.  It doesnt take much to set it off.  I havent cried yet today though.

Yesterday, I went to get my stitches out and started crying again when seeing the GP.  Just remembering this makes me want to cry again.

It just keeps coming.

I cant wait for the drugs to smooth out inside me.

It looks like the GP did a good job with removing the growth on my stomach.  The results came back as normal.  It was “some big word” and she advised it was good we removed it now.

The scar is quite fine and she said it would disappear in time.  All good.

After the GP, I went upstairs for my appointment with the psychologist and cried through most of that.

It seems to be my thing at the moment.

I know it will get better as the drugs even out.

I have had to have another day off work.  I cant exactly go to work and start crying all over the place.

I had already organised to have tomorrow off to go to the PTSD clinic, so dont have to go to work until Saturday.

Ive SMSed one of my people to see if they can swap next Saturday for this Saturday.  Fingers crossed.

Im hoping I will be better by some time on the weekend.  I want to try an xtend barre class, so I can see if I like it.

If I do I want to do the 60 Day Challenge, which starts on February 10.

I did ballet when I was at school and still love to watch it and listen to Swan Lake etc.

Xtend Barre is a mixture of ballet barre exercises and pilates.