a bit messed up

I cant believe it’s been a week since I last posted.

This week has quickly disappeared.

And what a week it has been.

I haven’t even read anyone elses blogs this week.  Something I was going to try and catch up on.

I think the dizziness I was feeling last week has finally gone, which I am assuming is the dregs of the Pristiq leaving my system.

I hadn’t been crying as much in the week either.  I has gradually petered off.

That is, until today.

I didnt go to work on Monday.  I just couldnt face it.

Tuesday, Wednesday and today, I was able to work from home, thankfully.

My new Director approved this.  Im not sure what he must be thinking.

I rang my previous Director, who is still my department’s boss for our sector.  She has been a great boss through all this madness.

She told me that my new Director had a chat to her and advised that he had approved me taking Friday’s off for medical reasons.  He doesnt know what is going on, but has been quite good with it.

The Fridays off being for the PTSD programme.

I just hope when I go back and chat to him that I dont cry, because just thinking about it now makes me want to cry.

That could be because Im not having a particularly good day and have been crying quite a bit since this afternoon.

I will go back to work on Tuesday.

I think I need to get out of the house.

My thoughts are starting to scare me a bit.

Not a great start to 2014, but hopefully when the Allegron is settled in my system, I will go back to not feeling as much.

I just want to cry all the time.

I really hope its hurries up.  I dont know how much longer my strength will hold up, with all the emotions I am feeling and am not used to.

I really, really wish my Mum was still here to help me through this.  I dont have anyone anymore to just hold my hand or hug me through the hard times.


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